Oh my god, I'm a stay at home mom!

This shouldn't be too surprising, since I haven't worked in over a year, but before now I was in denial.

Until my son was born I was earning more than my husband.  I decided I'd like to stay home for the first year of my son's life so I quit my job, naively believing that I'd be able to find part time employment after a year out of work.  Last month, I dusted off my resume, added my most recent experience, and sent it to a few people.  The response I got was less than encouraging: "The chances of finding part time work in the IT industry are virtually nil."

Now, I'm not wedded to the industry.  In fact, I'd be quite happy doing something else, but I'm not prepared to take an entry level position just to start working again.  It's just not practical; working is too expensive to get paid beans.

The going rate for childcare in our area is about $75/day (wombats) and competition for places is fierce.  If you already have your foot in the door, it could be a few months before you can pick up an extra day of care each week for your child.  If your child doesn't already attend childcare, you can expect it to be a year.

Childcare covers the hours between 7am and 6pm, with hefty penalties if you are late to pick up your child, which means you have to be strict with your work hours.  There's no option for half days, or any reliable way to pick up casual days (for those times when you really need to attend a meeting on  day when you don't normally work).  This is when the other types of care kick in: nannies and daddies.  Which you choose depends on how much dad earns and how much you travel.  If this is a rarity, dad might stay home for the day, but if dad earns a lot or you travel a lot, then a nanny is a cheaper option.  The going rate for a nanny in our area is about $17/hour.

Not that I want to have my child in childcare for that much time.  Sure, it's nice to have a break from changing nappies and conversations with someone who sounds like the teacher in the Charlie Brown cartoons, but I'd still like to be one of the primary carers in my child's life.

Another hidden cost is the loss of government benefits when resuming work.  If I were to work three days a week, for $20/hour, I would forfeit about $3,500 in government benefits, making my effective tax rate about 30%, compared with the tax rate of 16% for people without a child.    Combining taxes and lost benefits with the aforementioned cost of childcare makes my marginal take home income only slightly better than if I were in the highest tax bracket.  Of course, the Australian government makes it easy for all Australian parents to weigh up the cost of returning to the workforce by making the cost depend on your partner's income and your prospective income, tax rate, medicare levy, tax offset, family tax benefit A, family tax benefit B, and childcare benefit, not to mention the family tax benefit supplement, which they don't even remotely try to explain how it is calculated or who is eligible for it.

There are other costs to working: transportation, work clothing, out of hours baby sitters.  I read a quote from one woman who was spending nearly $200/month on the magazines she read on the train!

Of course, there are costs to staying home as well, most notably the lost experience and contact with the industry that will ultimately result in lower wages when I return to the workforce, which could haunt me for the rest of my working life.

For now, I've decided to stay home a little longer.  Each day I feel my market value slipping away, but I try not to think about that because if I am already unmarketable after one year out of work I in danger of becoming a permanent housewife if I stay home too long.